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At Your Lowest

by Binary Heart

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1.
Winterhaven 03:23
Don't expect me to call you, I have better things to do with my time on your birthday I'm sure you'll be plenty busy, making your weekend plans with friends for a night you won't remember It will be a night where you will render syntax useless And shine a bright light on the subject of distress And realize your emotions are falsely professed But one thing is sure, it'll be great You'll love the attention, your increasing heart rate Will decrease with every drink that you put down Well I, don't have to worry, you have the company of someone else on your day with special meaning I'm sure, my value is worthless to you, or else your lies wouldn't have found a way to get past your lips Would it kill you to think that I'm happy without you Or make you crack smiles if I'm lonely without you Now I know I should live my life without you For one thing, it shows you have changed Your actions have proved your morale's not the same Nothing will mend the mistakes that you've made now And I'll move on somehow Cause I understand now that the time I've spent investing in your love Was really invested in a lie I've given my best, then my best became just good enough for you I'll be ok because, I'll hope you know, I'm happy without you It makes me smile, cause I'm living without you I'll choke down these shots, while toasting your memory Cause the one thing I'm doing today is drinking in celebration that I Won't be there to increase your heart rate and hope yours decreases with every drink I put down
2.
We wander now, hopeless The kiss we shared, is now a memory I made mistakes, and wear them Like tattered clothes, for my weddings first dance So if I'm dreaming, wake me up To face the dawn, and process The past night, without the fog of alcohol In which I learned, the fire Deep in your heart, thrives on something more than this I just hope I'm what you need The silence created makes it just that much harder to think I lie awake at night reliving every word between every drink Anticipation transcends sleep of dreaming to see you again And pray that things between us stay the same. We have regrets, we show them with our actions that differed from before And they speak more than we have in the last week, oh how I miss those conversations I'm just trying to understand The miscommunication got lost between both of our lips Romances form from an alcohol induced friendly kiss Some loves will last forever, and be glad about their mistakes While others tend to walk away ashamed. I wander now, hopelessly Holding on, to a spark I thought that burned deep in your heart, yet still I Can't help but think We could've been the lucky ones.
3.
To Whom it may concern: I'm sorry for this letter, I present to you tonight Because I've tried things differently but it turns out the same for me Getting up by 5 and out of work by 9 And all this social deprivation left me empty and hollow inside, the shell I had was once filled with hope Taken over by a work ethic and schedule for sleep, that all my dreams are slipping far from the string I hold In all my life, I tried to be the one who never forgot what was home But now my life, consists of being too far gone to go back to that home or will I? I have seen better, I've lived a better life than the life that I live now before my response to responsibility was staying in the music scene and giving up my dreams just to make all ends meet My feelings subside with the bills stacked so high, that I couldn't afford to go down that road that was filled with laughter and dreams, adult responsibilities that forces me to stay at this financial stability And now I have the money, just no meaning to living this life, I haven't seen the friends I have in weeks And the music that I put all of my blood and sweat into, its the time to do it all again I seek In all my life, I tried to be the one who never forgot what was home But now my life, consists of being too far gone to go back to that home or will I? My days are close to numbered, so count on me to end this all before it ends me first And I'll be counting seconds before my untimely demise gets any worse As you read this letter, please don't think any worse of me, because I'd rather be here with you In all my life, I tried to be the one who never forgot what was home But now my life, consists of being too far gone to go back to that home Before I go, I'd like to say all the cliche things that you ought to know And on that note, I'll end this by signing off the way I always do. Peace and love, Me
4.
There are little moments you caught my eye its when you'd say something endearing and then before you walk away, you'd shoot a smile It made me think that your heart was exposed to the ideas of us, i supposed all those moments started to compile So I told you "I love you" But you took your time To formulate a response Much different than mine Now if only I believed those words were true I could be free Congenial meetings have been fading into close to nothing, I'm waiting while our conversations slowly unwind Then there came the day with wistful reproach as if knowing my heart would just close with a notion you've kept fresh on your mind you told me you were leaving I pleaded please stay that hid behind my lips as you walked away if only i believed those words would make something change We could be free from all the hidden games we play ignoring the fact that honesty could kill the flames instead the beauty in your eyes don't match words that you say Face value has a way of hiding things that you believe But lies conceal your wants and not your needs You should be free

credits

released July 24, 2011

Mike Costa: Vocals and Guitars
Recorded at: Sun-Dried Tomatoes Studios,
Engineered by: Tom Malinowski at Cellar Door Studios,
Cover Photo: Joelle Andres

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Binary Heart

Also available for free at www.quoteunquoterecords.com/qur081.htm

Mike Costa: Vocals, Guitars
Steve Wozniak: Bass
Erica Clayton: Keyboards, Vocals
Jon Greco: Guitar

(Band photo by Nick Karp)
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